Rumor has it

In the workplace it can surreptitiously move under the guise of “networking.” In the church it can be elevated to the status of “prayer requests.” But when brought to a court of law, it is usually called “defamation of character.”   

It can be dangerous and destructive. Written or spoken words intended to harm or hurt others can have serious implications, especially when those words are communicated in the public domain.

People engage in gossip for various reasons. Most of us have gossiped at one time or another; and we’ve been the victims of it, too. Chronic gossipers with destructive intentions tend to have poor self esteem; putting others down seems to make them momentarily feel better about themselves.

Gossip can also be a way of getting attention, giving the gossiper a sense of power. Being the first with the exclusive news gives some people an adrenaline rush.

And some people’s motive for gossip is simply revenge: They want to get back at someone who has hurt them in some way.

 Just as idle time is a devil’s workshop, so boredom is gossip’s incubator. I sometimes find myself asking, “Where do people have the time to come up with this stuff?”

And all it takes is a word pulled out of context, twisted in just the slightest way, and voila: You have a nice, juicy piece of gossip cooked to perfection and ready to serve a hungry recipient who chews on it, then passes it to the next gossiper. Naturally, it gets nastier with each helping.

Gossip is nothing new: We humans have been engaging in it for centuries. The classical Greek Athenian philosopher, Socrates, observed, “Strong minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, weak minds discuss people.” The biblical King David spoke about those “who are always twisting what I say” (Psalm 56:5), and he called out a gossiper: “You love to destroy others with your words” (Psalm 52:4). Even Jesus of Nazareth wasn’t immune to gossip. One of the rumors about him was that he was “a glutton and a drunkard” (Matthew 11:19).

No, the rumor mill has been busy for many years.

But with the advent of texting, Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube, the old rumor mill has evolved into an electronic phenomenon, allowing gossip to go viral instantaneously. And once it’s out, it’s virtually impossible to retrieve. What’s in the public domain can damage a person’s reputation, and that can result in legal consequences. If you haven’t thought about it, you should. You might find yourself in trouble before you realize what you’ve done. And, you need not think you have to be a helpless victim of malicious gossip, either.

Defamation of character is passing along false information as fact. The intent has to be to hurt a person or an organization, and it has to be told or written to people other than the victim. So, if you tell the furniture salesman to his face that he is a lying scoundrel because he sold the furniture he promised to you based on what you said you would pay, that’s not defamation of character. But, sending an email to his customers or publicly accusing him of the same is. More specifically, slander is when defamation of character is spoken; libel is when it’s written.

If you are the victim of defamation of character, legal action may be your only recourse.  But if at all possible, try and ignore it. Making more of the matter can do just that: make more of the matter.

You can always take the tactic of Henry, whom Mildred, the church gossip, accused of being a problem drinker. She had seen Henry’s old pickup parked in front of the town’s only drinking establishment, and that was enough evidence for Mildred to pronounce poor ol’ Henry guilty.

When apprised of her accusations, Henry didn’t explain, defend, or deny anything. He said nothing.

But later that evening, Henry quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred’s house, walked home, and left it there all night.

Don’t you love Henry?

Near the end of her hit, “Rumor has it,” pop vocal artist Adele sings the words, “Just ‘cause I said it, don’t mean that I meant it.”

And I might add, “Just ‘cause you heard it, don’t mean that you need repeat it.”

Because that’s the way rumors have it.